'ADU' the bad dark guy, unleashes. An exclusive interview gone wrong with Adrian Fernandes.

I Am Evil

Enough said.

DL - Aur, kaisa hai bhai?

AF - PARDON? I'd rather you address me by my name.

DL - Greetings, Adrian.

AF - THE NAME IS Adu YOU FILTHY STEM OF A PLANT.

DL - Our apoligies, Adu. So how are you doing today?

AF - JOlly good pip pip. How you doing carcass?

DL - Wow, Adu, you seem to be in a very cheerful mood.

AF - Indeed. I watched Baby's Day Out last night.

DL - What?

AF - BLA.. BLACK! I WATCHED BLACK FRIDA.. I WATCHED TRANSFORMERS LAST NIGHT! NO, I ..I WATCHED A CAT DIE! It happened right in front of my eyes. I laughed when its last breath escaped its beak.

DL - Cats don't have beaks.

AF - DO NOT FOOL ME YOU ACNE RIDDEN CHILD. I WILL CAST MY SWORD IN YOUR MOUTH AND TEAR YOU APART AND THEN EA....

DL - ..Ok-ok, sorry. So tell us what are you upto?

AF - Nothing much. Just been, Oiling up the treadmill, Greasing up the racoon, Cranking up my rooster, Lubricating guns, Masturbat....

DL - ..Um, yeah ok. Is that your life in college or at the gym?

AF - NO! YOU MUCK OF ROTTENNESS. I SWEAR TO GOD, I WILL TAKE YOUR TONGUE AND CUT IT WITH MY SWORD AND THEN I WILL CUT YOUR BOD.....

DL - ..Wait, did you just say, “GOD”?

AF - SATAN! SATAN! I MEANT SATAN! *to self - forgive me, my dark father. Today I will sacrifice a pig*

DL - Ohh Ok! And howz it going with the girls?

AF - Girls come, girls go its all about the love vermin. DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE MY DARK SKIN YOU MORON. OR, I WILL CUT YOUR SCUB OF FLESH AND EAT IT.

DL - Alright then. I think that will be all.

AF - Ok jolly good putrid wound.

DL - Yeah. Thank you for your time anyway. We shall meet you soon. Really. Thank you, Adrian.

AF - THE NAME IS Adu YOU TIT OF A PIG. I WILL CAST MY SWORD IN YO....


We're sorry.